✏ The Firm Handshake

Attention, young adults…

Believe it or not, there was a time when you judged a person’s character simply by their handshake.

I distinctly remember that while growing up, my father would give me lessons on the proper way to shake someone’s hand. And not just the handshake itself; he would start with how to approach a person when doing so. You walked toward them, extending your hand with a welcoming posture, a smile on your face, and you began your initial comment even before you grip their hand.

He probably made me do it 20 times, and it makes me smile just thinking about it. 

We would practice that for years, little impromptu crash courses to make sure I never lost that skill. When I had the honor to work for him, there were countless times after a meeting when he would comment to me about the other person’s handshake. And, he would trust my opinion as well.

If it was firm and they held it for a few seconds while looking you in the directly in the eyes, he believed that was a person you could trust.

He said to be cautious of someone with sweaty palms, a weak grip and no eye contact; that they’re probably not to be trusted.

I cherish those times now that he is gone. My father was a man of his word; if he shook your hand and said he would do something, come hell or high water, you could count on it.

“A handshake is an email you send with your body.”
– Anthony Finucane

Today, we do business across continents without even so much as a handshake, but rather a screen-to-screen discussion where we are forced to gain as much business knowledge as possible, as well as character of the person on the other end, without any in-person interaction.

Sure, there are other signals that we can look for, but give me the choice between a phone call and a face-to-face meeting, and I will ALWAYS choose the latter.

There is something about the human connection that strengthens the character of leadership within us all.

You can never replace the personal greeting; the initial small talk which leads to future trust. The dialogue that, over time, earns you the right to negotiate, but more importantly, provides you the opportunity to sense verbal and non-verbal cues. To look a person in the eye, have disagreements, share in solutions and celebrate the success of an agreement.

And how do you solidify your agreement?

Through a handshake.

Meeting people face-to-face is critical to be successful.

Social media, emails, texts or even a WebEx should never be a replacement for the human connection. If there are costs associated with making one, that is price of doing business. If you want to distinguish yourself from your competitor, form a true, personal relationship with that client.

The easiest and most successful way to earn the trust of another person is to sit across a table from them and be yourself. Don’t fake it, be authentic. Don’t pretend to know everything, be humble. And most of all, listen more than you talk.

VENTURE + LEAD + PROSPER

Humbled to lead,

#legacy  #hero  #chargeup   #chargeuptoday #lessonsinleadership   #leadership   #lead   #process   #strongleader   #patience #leadershipjourney  #resilience  #failure  #success  #moveforward  #adversity #areyouready  #leadandfollow  #mentorship  #mentor #venture #lead #prosper #reflect #inspire #empower

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©2018 Victor Pisano/Charge Up. All rights reserved. You are free to use portions of this publication, provided the following credit is listed at the bottom: ©2018 Victor Pisano/Charge Up, is a media-based entity that provides intriguing, innovative and distinctive content, engaging its readers with real-world challenges and solutions while embracing obstacles and the value that failure can provide. While that sounds serious, we promise you will both learn AND laugh (and sometimes cry).Contact Charge Up at victor@chargeuptoday.com or visit our website at www.chargeuptoday.com.

Victor Pisano✏ The Firm Handshake
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✏ Some People Have a Problem for Every Solution

Remember when negativity was only reserved for certain math concepts or when talking about the temperatures in Alaska? How times have changed . . .

People are bombarded by negativity all over social media, rather than all the good around them. As a result, they become obsessed with negativity. Instead of trying to find balance in our lives, stress and a growing sense of entitlement have given us the authority to be an “expert” on everything, and an unquenchable need to voice our positions from behind a keyboard.

We have lost sight of gratitude.

“Negative people need drama like oxygen.
Stay positive; it will take their breath away.”
– MJ Korvan

Think of it this way: our mind can only think one thought at a time, so changing the negative into a positive eliminates the negative. If we focus on the positive, we have the ability to be more creative, productive, engaging and respected. Practice this every day, and the results will be incredibly rewarding.

What about negative people? You’re either a part of the problem or the solution. If all you do is complain and have a negative aura about you, eventually you will notice that the only people who listen to you anymore are those that enjoy complaining too. You have a choice, either continue complaining or show the courage to do something about it. Be the change, apply the energy you spend being negative toward something constructive.

“Some People Really Suck — AVOID THEM!”

Here are 5 things you can practice daily to change the negative into a positive:

  1. Gratitude Journal: Start each day off immediately after you wake up and write five things that you are grateful for before you start your day. The key is, don’t just write it — keep it in your head and reference it when a negative situation presents itself. You can even write it on an index card and carry it with you as a reminder. Don’t let the negative win.
  2. Be Mindful in the Moment: Learn your triggers, whether it is certain situations or particular people. Develop an internal plan to counter the situation and not fall into the trap of engaging in nonconstructive dialogue. Begin to become mindful of the moment, and don’t feed into the drama. It’s not about having to always be positive, but rather disassociating yourself with the constant negativity around you.
  3. Stop Dwelling: Negativity is no different than any other skill we possess. If you practice negativity, anger and resentment every day, eventually, you will become very good at it and it will become a habit. Look around you — from the newspaper headlines, cable news reports, social media and the water cooler — it seems as if everybody has a bone to pick. It’s time to let it go. Practice constructive thinking and put things into perspective.
  4. Pay it Forward: The quickest way to change your perspective from negative to positive is to simply do something for somebody else. If you can do an act of kindness for someone else, you can’t help but feel optimistic. It’s a win-win situation.
  5. Surround yourself with Positive People: According to Tim Ferriss, one of my favorite authors and speakers, “You are the average of the five people you most associate with.” Take a moment and do an assessment of who that would be in your life. It is critical to understand that these people will have an impact on your mindset, whether positive or negative. With that in mind, make your choices carefully.

Watch your thoughts, they become words.
Watch your words; they become actions.
Watch your actions; they become habits.
Watch your habits; they become character.
Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.

Life is too short — focus on doing the right thing and make a POSITIVE impact on somebody today!

VENTURE + LEAD + PROSPER

Humbled to lead,

#legacy  #hero  #chargeup   #chargeuptoday #lessonsinleadership   #leadership   #lead   #process   #strongleader   #patience #leadershipjourney  #resilience  #failure  #success  #moveforward  #adversity #areyouready  #leadandfollow  #mentorship  #mentor #venture #lead #prosper #reflect #inspire #empower

RECEIVE MY FREE WEEKLY E-BLAST, THE WIRE

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The only way we can inspire is to grow our community – would you please share this with family and friends, ask that they subscribe to Charge Up, and follow us on social media?

©2018 Victor Pisano/Charge Up. All rights reserved. You are free to use portions of this publication, provided the following credit is listed at the bottom: ©2018 Victor Pisano/Charge Up, is a media-based entity that provides intriguing, innovative and distinctive content, engaging its readers with real-world challenges and solutions while embracing obstacles and the value that failure can provide. While that sounds serious, we promise you will both learn AND laugh (and sometimes cry).Contact Charge Up at victor@chargeuptoday.com or visit our website at www.chargeuptoday.com.

Victor Pisano✏ Some People Have a Problem for Every Solution
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✏ How Important Is Character?

“Ability may get you to the top, but it takes character to keep you there.”
– John Wooden

Whether it is a first or last impression, your character will play a vital role in your ability to lead. In building your character — guiding by your beliefs and actions — you are in essence building your legacy.

Now, when conversations venture into this territory, some leaders tend to confuse character and reputation. But I am not talking about your reputation here — and this is the difference between the two:

CHARACTER IS WHO YOU ARE.
REPUTATION IS WHAT OTHERS THINK YOU ARE.

We have become a hyper-judgmental generation, and over-focus on what others think about us. Whether it’s because of insecurity or a lack of self-confidence, it’s something that should have no bearing whatsoever on who you are as a person, or more importantly, as a leader.

If you confidently, consistently operate with integrity, trust and positive influence, then your character will speak for itself. And how others perceive you — your reputation — will be a result of other key traits associated with your character, some of which include:

CONFIDENCE – Your presence will define your success. Not outwardly, but the way in which you lead your team with clear initiatives, effective communication and a shared respect.

EMPATHY – By being empathetic, you are showing those around you that you understand the challenges they face. Encourage open discussion and empower others to find solutions. Your belief in your team will go a long way.

GRATITUDE – Nothing beats feeling appreciated for your efforts and willingness to go outside your comfort zone for the good of the team. It is a simple gesture, and your team needs those pats on the back…it makes them want to do more.

VALUES – What do you stand for? What will you not sacrifice? If they are exhibited every day, these values become a critical part of your character and your integrity.

COMPOSURE – Not allowing your emotions to cloud your judgement is critical in a group. By controlling our composure, we take charge of the situation, and in turn, display why we have the ability to lead.

FAILUREWithout failure, you won’t understand the joy of success. Whether it is you or your team who failed, take responsibility, find the solution and move on. Failure has led many to amazing innovation, inventions and solutions; let it serve the same purpose in you.

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet.
Only through experience of trial and suffering can
the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved.”
– Helen Keller

If you are to succeed as a leader, it is imperative that you are self-aware and recognize the skills that you need to develop.  You must live according to your values everyday…in your personal and business life.

We are all blessed with the amazing ability to control our character by simply taking a few seconds to think before we speak, react or expose our composure. 

These precious seconds are our life jackets — know how to use them.

Regardless of age or tenure, be a leader with character. I assure you that in some way, you will make a difference and impact others in your abilities and how you carry yourself.

Make a difference today.

VENTURE + LEAD + PROSPER

Humbled to lead,

#legacy #chargeup   #chargeuptoday #lessonsinleadership   #leadership   #lead   #process   #strongleader   #patience #leadershipjourney  #resilience  #failure  #success  #payitforward  #adversity #areyouready  #leadandfollow  #mentorship  #mentor #venture #lead #prosper #reflect #inspire #empower #buildforsuccess

RECEIVE MY FREE WEEKLY E-BLAST, THE WIRE

SUBSCRIBE NOW

The only way we can inspire is to grow our community – would you please share this with family and friends, ask that they subscribe to Charge Up, and follow us on social media?

©2018 Victor Pisano/Charge Up. All rights reserved. You are free to use portions of this publication, provided the following credit is listed at the bottom: ©2018 Victor Pisano/Charge Up, is a media-based entity that provides intriguing, innovative and distinctive content, engaging its readers with real-world challenges and solutions while embracing obstacles and the value that failure can provide. While that sounds serious, we promise you will both learn AND laugh (and sometimes cry).Contact Charge Up at victor@chargeuptoday.com or visit our website at www.chargeuptoday.com.

Victor Pisano✏ How Important Is Character?
More . . .